So I went to Staples. I bought: 2 fountain pens. Shut up. They are disposable so that makes them modern and sleek. But they have those adorable fancy, very pointy ends that I love so very much. So pointy and fluid. I want to write on the world with them.
So this belies something about me that I wasn't expecting to face: Generation Gap. Already. That's right, kiddies, I plan to take notes. With my pen. On paper. In a Multimedia Design program. They are going to laugh at me, but I read an article that validates my position as a mature student: It stated that people who physically write their notes retain their information better, okay? I NEED ALL THE EDGES I CAN GET.
Yeah. Shut up, you. I need to write notes. In cursive. With my new pointy pen. The French call it a stylo. That's "stee-low". I think we both know that they know a thing or two about pens. So fancy.
So the other thing I bought? (It seemed like a really good, practical idea when I was in the store). The other thing, Readers? Is the world's biggest binder.
I said shut up. I need to write notes, I said. In cursive. IN A BINDER.
So I get my brand new binder home. I put it on my new desk and look at it. I'm ready to admire the crap out of my new Five Star binder. I get it all set up and then blammo.
Holy God. It is so big. This is the biggest binder you can even get, I think. But it didn't seem this big in the store. It didn't seem hilariously giant when I was combing through the binders to select the perfect one that didn't say, "KEENER" or "TRYING SO HARD" or "MATURE STUDENT ALERT". I mean, it's black and blue and rather respectable. That's what I thought. I'm only 34, you guys.
But it takes up more than half the desk. The desk is five feet across, okay? It eats the new fifteen cent package of loose leaf paper that I went out and bought for it. It eats it like so many dainty aperitifs.
It has a damned handle. WHAT WAS I THINKING? A HANDLE??? That should be indicator numero uno that the binder is too large. Neil made me do it. He said I needed a handle so I could carry coffee at the same time. Coffee, you guys. I was suckered. Yes, I could carry my coffee in one hand and my binder full of everything else I own. Including the life vests.
|Check it out. I photo edited it. OoOooh!|
Hey! That reminds me! Look at what I got for F-R-E-E at Staples when I bought the megabinder:
It's a sticky note Happy Apple! (Photo Edited fancily to prove that I'm not a Luddite.)
I think they were probably just impressed with the size of my new binder. I hope they don't think I'm overcompensating for something.